Nov 21 – Just say No.

It’s the penultimate clown class tonight. We have this weekend off and then next Wednesday is the last one. What am I going to do? What am I going to complain/write about?

Last class was really quite fun, even considering I was in the middle of a cold, and my nose was full of snot, and my energy level was running about 40% of its already low level. I guess this is the one time I didn’t mind wearing the clown nose. Normally it is hard to breathe through, but since I couldn’t breathe any way, it really wasn’t an impediment. Plus it helped keep the snot from running down my face.

We did our last element of our Element Embodying Exercises. Air. We gusted, breezed, and whirlwinded ourselves around the room for a while, slowly adding more human elements in. Then George asked us what element we thought was most dominant in our clown. I think its Air for ol’ Smarly. There is quite a bit of Earth in there too I think. Heaven and Earth.

We did a fun exercise after that where we were just three clowns sitting on a bench doing nothing. We self-selected our groups of three, went up, put on the nose, came out and sat down on a bench just big enough for three clowns to sit side by side.

George made us sit there waiting until we actually were doing nothing, and then let us go. It was funny how all the quirky mayhem that ended up developing started from nothing. There was no preconceived plan, there was no trick to do, nothing to think about. Just three clowns sitting on a bench doing nothing.

But it is hard to sit still, especially for a clown. Soon enough someone would start twitching and fidgeting. Then another clown would react to that, and that would cause some other reaction, until things spiraled out of control, or they died energetically and then George would tell us to go, and the next group would come up.

The first time I was up I was sitting on the end of the bench in Clown Position 1. We sat for a bit, and then the middle clown (Position 2), turned to me and said “Soup” in his Ukrainian Clown accent. I looked at him like he was a freak and scooted a little further away from him. Clown 2 kept saying “Soup” and eventually roped Clown 3 into saying soup. Then they were both saying soup at me. I thought they were weird and scooted further away.

The kept saying soup as if they wanted me to say soup, but I didn’t want to say soup. It was like a 70’s after school special. There I was on the school playground and the bad kids come up and offer me drugs. No, no, I don’t want your drugs. Yes, yes. Try it. Just try it. Soup. Soup. Soup.


I was barely on the bench at this point, really only being held on by Clown 2 as he tried to pull me back and make me say soup.


I was weakening. Maybe I should just say soup and get it over with. Then they would leave me alone. I tried, but no sound would come out. Ssss….sssooooo…No.





Finally George told us to stop. I had survived without saying soup. The teacher watching the recess came over and shooed the bad kids away.


The second up was funny but different. I was in the middle this time. At some point Clown 3 ended up on the floor, and then I was squished between Clown 1 and 3 as they fought, and then I ended up on the floor. I have no idea.

All I can say is it was fun.


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